Short Supply

Hey guys I know it's not me you want to see here, but I just wanted to let you guys know that I'm not abandoning you here. Letters are in short supply right now, I'm guessing with the holiday season. Hopefully soon I will receive more letters!

Maddie,

I hope you had a Merry X-mas with your mother. Maybe soon I can get the money to fly up and see you. I miss you so much and you are growing so fast. I feel like I am missing everything. I hope that you do not resent me for not being there enough. I did not want you and your mother to move but she said she had to. I do love you and I hope your mother has told you that. Maybe soon I can see you again.

Love You,
Daddy

I Failed You

To my son,

I am soo sorry that I have failed you. I tried my best and still couldn't provide you with what you needed as a child. If I could go back and change things I would. I am so so so so sorry. I hope you can forgive me. I know that you deserved so much more and I hope that you can do better by your family. You are a great man now and someday I hope we can have a good relationship again.

Your Dad

Best Friends

Dear Best Friend,
Your still not talking to me, this is the longest ever in our 11 year friendship, that we have gone without talking and I am beginning to become scared. I am scared I will lose you, I am scared all our memories will someday mean nothing and I am scared that someday I will really need you and you won't bethere. I know i messed up that night. He should havenever come over, when I knew he liked you, but he toldme I was pretty, he showed an interest. I was naive and I fell for a guy I barely knew and went behind yourback. I thought it would be ok but that night was bad.You know most of it but I could never tell you whatreally happened. I want to forget that night and I know that it will always at least for awhile be a sorespot in our friendship. I hope you will talk to me again. I understand your going to want to bring this up and I understand how this hurt you. I wish you could see my side of it too and see how truly sorry I am. If I could take it all back I would.

Please I love you
Me

Oh Well

Dear Selfish Husband of Mine,

I am going to find a job! I DO NOT want to sit at home all day. I am sick and tired of being a stay at home mother! I enjoy getting out of the house and working!

You don't know it yet, but I have an interview on Monday and another on Tuesday! I already have childcare arranged and budgeted costs. I am doing this with or without your support. If you don't like it too bad!

I have my degree and I know how to use it; and it's going to waste here!

Hopefully you will eventually come around, if not.... oh well!

I can't sit here anymore; I feel like I'm going crazy!

Deal With It,
PT

Invisible

Dear XXXX,
I want you to know that, despite everything, you are still my friend. No matter what has happened, no matter how much time has passed, no matter how things might have ended, I still care. Maybe we don't talk anymore, or maybe we just don't talk about the right things. I want you to know that I still love you. Sometimes, I have watched you struggle, and wished that I could have done anything to make it easier for you. I've cried for you, and I've worried. I hope that the positive vibes I fervently sent your way helped somehow. Maybe it doesn't matter, but I still think positively on your behalf, even if you can't. But maybe I don't know how you're doing, or what you're been up to. I send my best wishes your way, just in case. I wish I was better, stronger. I wish I could have kept the promises I made to you. I wish I could say this directly to you.
Love,
You invisible friend

Home?

To whoever,

Did I Mess Up?
Where am I?
And how did I get here? Not physically, no; but emotionally? Mentally? Religiously? Sexually?

I'm doing so many things and thinking of so many things I never have before. And it scares me. A lot. And yet, it excites me at the same time.

I've been Protestant for so long now. Well, for forever really. Yesterday I visited an LDS church. And I felt so at home. Is that really what God wants of me though???? How can I know? When will I know? I've done my research... and am just waiting for an answer from God.

I've alienated some of my friends... no, one of my friends. She used to be my best friend though. Then she changed, and so did I. Now I barely talk to her.

My boyfriend is amazing... most of the time. Sometimes I don't understand him, or wish he would change, but really... he's incredible. I can't believe I ever ended up with someone like him. This feeling of being 'in debt' to him though has also caused me to do things I probably shouldn't have. But I'm not really sure if I regret them. They were dumb, yes, but it felt right at the time....no, I don't regret them. They've become a part of who I am. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Where am I? And how did I get here? ...Help?

~Confused~

I Cant Wait for You

Dear Ex Who Never Should Have Been An Ex,

I don’t know what I did to deserve to go from being your fiancée to your back up plan. I can’t believe that everything you told me about not changing or giving up on us turned out to be a lie. I can’t believe I have to resort to this to feel better since you won’t give me closure. There aren’t any answers, and I get that. But you’re such a jackass. “Someday, if it’s meant to be, we’ll be together.” What about every time you told me that I completed you? I understand that people change. You joined a frat, you want to hit it and quit it, and long distance wasn’t your thing even though you told me we should do it.

You don’t make me happy either. You think you’re the only one with needs. I’m a fucking good girlfriend. I would have made a damn good wife. You were my world, but when you changed your mind, you changed mine too. You think that I can sit around and be your backup? You think that can honestly happen? I’m going to get snatched up by someone who’s more of a man than you are. He’s going to treat me right. He won’t leave me hoping to find something that doesn’t exist.

I hate you. I love you. I miss you. I can’t get over you. You never initiate conversations with me, but when I tell you I can’t talk to you anymore, you decide we have to be friends. You’re just hurting me more. I miss you, but you’re not right for me anymore. You changed, and that’s why you broke up with me. Even though in my heart, I know you’ll come back to me someday, I’m not going to wait for you any longer.
I’ve had sex with two people since you left me. It’s been a month. In my attempt to fill the hole you left behind, I’ve made horrible choices. But even when I make good choices, I don’t feel any better.
There is someone else. I can’t seem to let myself be with him because it feels like cheating and because I hope you change your mind and come back to me. I was holding back from him because I was scared and waiting on you. I know you’ll realize your mistake sooner or later. But he makes me feel special. And he holds me the way you used to. But you’d rather play the field; never mind that we were engaged. Never mind that I spent all that money to come visit you. Never mind because you weren’t the one I needed.

Maybe you’re right; I love you more than you love me. Unfortunately, I can’t do this waiting, but I can’t move on. So I talk to you, and I hope that you’ll realize that I’m waiting right here, where you left me. So that you’ll love me again, and I won’t die alone.
So good luck, and when you’re ready to initiate a conversation with me, I may or may not kick you in the balls.

Sincerely,
Your Won’t Be Waiting Ex

All It Takes

Dear BooBooBear,

I constantly write you letters you will never read. You know me so well that you could probably read everything they say just by looking at me. I love you with all my heart. I know that you are right for me, and I know I'm right for you. What worries me is what happened before we met. You were a complete slut. You slept with too many girls to count, and you're barely 18. You drank, you did drugs, and you slept around. I'm innocent compared to you. I barely drink, I barely ever do drugs, only weed, and I never really slept around. You're my fourth. I look at us and see how different we are. I see all the reasons why we shouldn't work out. I've cried so many times because I'm putting so much of myself into this, when I expect it to end in failure. My heart breaks when you remind me you still talk to your ex-fucc-buddies. They are the reason I don't trust you 100%. I want to trust you, I want to believe you. I can't stop thinking about our future together. How soon we can be together. You know I feel this way, but I don't think you realize how much it hurts me. I love you so much. I just wish you could show me you love me too. I wish you could leave the past in the past and not bring it up anymore. The more it comes up, the more I start to distrust you. I want to make this work, but I feel like I'll forever be in the shadow of your past. All those nameless faces that gave you pleasure that you didn't need. All those girls who were one night stands. Why should I believe that I'm different? Just because you say so. Sadly, for me, that's all it takes. Forever baby, you and me.

Love always,
Pookie

Guess My Secret

Post Secret posted my secret today. When I seen it, I was floored. In that moment I cried again.

~*^*~

I Hate You

Dear WNY,

I have never told someone I hated them. Not out of anger. But I do. I hate you. And I'm sorry for hating you. You are a horrible person. You will die in your parents house alone. You will never find someone else to love you. With that knowledge I can forgive you. But I will never love you. Not as a lover, not as a friend, not as a human being. Goodbye. I hate you.

- RNC

Quit You

Mark,
Everytime I see you, look at you, I die a little inside. My heart breaks every time. It tears me apart to not know what your thinking about, or what you feel in your heart. I hate that every time I try to ask you, you somehow avoid the question, and the answer that I so long for, the answer that I need. Every day, I wonder what went wrong? Every day, I wonder why you broke up with me? You told me that I already knew why, and I don't. If I did, then why would I be asking you? If I already knew why, then why would I want to hear you say it? I'm at a point in my life, and in our relationship, because of what you did to me, because of how you made me feel, I want to beat the shit out of you. I want to tear you down, and make you feel like shit. I want to make you feel the exact same way you made me feel. The very same way I feel now. I know that I cant quit you. I know that I cant say no to you. You know that I cant quit you. You know that I cant say no to you. I know you take advantage of that. You know you take advantage of that. Every time you come over, every time we talk, it's just like we were still dating. I don't understand why we still can't be. You made me think, you made me BELIEVE that you wouldn't ever hurt me. Yet, you did. At a time when I needed you the most, you walked out on me, leaving me in the dark, without any answers. I told you even before we started dating that I was afraid to fall in love again, and that I didn't want to get hurt. Yet, you made it easy for me to love you. I, apparently made it easy for you to leave me. I cant figure out why either. I made dinner every night. I cleaned the house, and did laundry as soon as I came home from work. I was attentive to your every need. You wanted a cheese/meat/cracker platter, I made you a cheese/meat/cracker platter. You wanted a back massage, I gave you one. You wanted a quickie before church every sunday, I complied, making us late every time. You knew how much I hate being late to anywhere, for anything. Whatever is was that you wanted, you needed, I did for you, I got for you. EVERYTHING! You told me that you would never be able to find someone else like me, and that you made a big mistake losing me. So why is it that your not with me again? I want you to be with me. I was so happy with you. I enjoyed doing silly little things for you, like laying out your clothes for work in the morning, and waking you up with breakfast. I enjoyed doing everything that you asked me to do. It made me feel like I had a purpose, like there was a reason for my existence. Anyway, I still don't understand most of it, and I know you wont tell me. The only thing I want, is to have you back. I want to be happy again, and not have to hide my pain.

I still love you, no matter what. I have loved you for 8 years, even though we were only together for 3 months. I will keep loving you for years to come. Even still, if its not me you choose to spend the rest of your life with, I hope your happy in everything that you decide to do. Just remember me once in awhile is all I ask of you.

Back Stabber

Dear Tyler,
You hurt me. I wish that bothered you. You make me hate myself because I put up with your sorry ass. First off, you have a girlfriend and you tell me you love ME. Yet, I am not a priority. I understand you don't want to be in a long distance relationship with me. I live in Ca and you live in NY. It wouldn't work. Plus, I met you on Post Secret, and even though you say you want to meet me, whose to say that won't change by October? When we talked on the phone for the first time, we talked for 5 hours. I was hoping you would promise me that even though I am handicapped and I need help with every day things, like putting my hair up and my shoes on etc. you would be there for me. Oh boy, was I wrong. You promised me if you were single by October that you would FUCK me.

And, for some reason I can't tell you how I really feel about this because I'm scared of losing you, so I will say it here:

FUCK YOU!

You will never see this, but it's out, so I'll just go back to letting you smash my face into the pavement.Thanks. A lot.


Love, Your second choice, Ashley


P.S. I love you too. Dickhead. Go fuck the person who fucked your best friends SIX times. She makes you happy, right?

Oh, and by the way, this whole time you've been texting my 'sister' you're texting me. At least I know you won't fuck her behind my back.

Regret

My biggest regret is knowing that I could have a wonderful big sister who is a friend, not an enemy, if I had just taken the time to stop being such a fuck-up... And I could have had a great relationship with my mom earlier had I just been honest.

My secret is that when I fucked up the most in life I lied to my mom and told her I didn’t do it just so she’d help me out of the bind financially since I had to hire a lawyer. I felt so guilty about it that I straightened up and stopped doing drugs, stopped stealing, and stopped lying altogether.

I know she knows the truth… but I don’t think she wants to admit it… and I’m grateful that for one last time she looked the other way and helped me when I needed it the most. I think she would have helped me anyway… I know she would have. But I couldn’t stand the thought of the disappointed look on her face…

At least my biggest secret lead to my rehabilitation and eventually to a better relationship with my mom and to a great job and a great boyfriend… I never was a bad person… I just made bad decisions. I wish I could tell her… But our relationship is so much better now than it ever has been and I don’t think I can give that up just because I feel bad. I try every day to make it up to her and let her know how much I really appreciate her and how much she’s done for me. I love you, Mom.


Kyla

Waiting

Dear Super A,

I love you. Yes, I love you. More than you will ever know. I've loved you for 16 years and when this is all over, i hope to god you're there waiting for me. As for me, i will wait for you forever.

-lmgt

Grow Up!

Dear roommates,
I am so sick of you leaving our house a mess. You never clean up after yourselves, there are always dirty dishes in the sink, beer cans everywhere, weed and your pieces on our table, cigarette butts ashed into a cup of water on our kitchen table, our bathroom is a disaster, no one ever takes the trash out, and you leave things all over the house and expect people to clean up after you. I understand that one of you has a job and you don't have much time between that and school to clean up, but at least try to do your part. On top of that, be respectful of others when you live with people who don't enjoy your habits and know you are using communal space like an asshole. On top of that, stop being two-faced and being so nice to people to their face, and then talking about them behind their backs. We are in college, not middle school. GROW UP. I know what you say about me, both of you, and you don't realize it. If I am being cold, its because I don't like you and I don't fake to either. I think that you guys are secretly lovers and that's why you hate me because I am not into it. I know, crazy, but you guys weird me out. I really hope that you each find your own man and stop hanging on mine, or at least try because I am sick of seeing it. Oh, and I know you made out with him while I was abroad. He told me. Real nice, friend. I don't care how drunk you are, you know who your roommate is dating, and you know that there are many other guys around that you could have chosen form but you chose mine. Good work, you'll never find a man if you don't stop hanging all over someone everyone else's men. I am counting down the days until I move out and get my own place, and I hope that you can function in the dirt hole you will encompass next year.

Sincerely,
The girl 'that really sucks' and has an obnoxious laugh

Worth It All?

Hey My Not Even Close To/Never Will Be/Wish With All My Heart You Where Boyfriend,

You drive me insane and I like you way more then I should. We only truly hang out every two weeks or so, but I see you almost everyday. Everytime I know you are working I run through a debate of whether or not I should go see you or at what time or how many times before it seems like I'm obsessing. The problem is that I am and I can't get over you. Until this weekend I hadn't hungout with you in a month since we slept together. I wish I could talk to you about that. I've talked to everyone else about it, even your "fiancee" but not you. You the one that I want to talk to you more then anyone. You ask the things that nobody else will ask, you make me laugh. You make me feel shy and insecure, but at the same time so beautiful and amazing. You make it so hard to get over you because I can't stay away from you. Everytime we have a conversation I want it to keep going, to never end. I imagine having conversations with you in my head all the time. Of having enough time to actually hangout with you and have a deep talk like we used to, before we did it.

I want to ask you if you truly love her or if you're just marrying her for the kids or just because you know that she couldn't function without you? If you do love her then I want to ask you why you did it? Why couldn't you just leave it alone? Never bring up the attraction between you and me? If you don't love her, then how can you give up your whole life to be with her? Commit to her when she isn't the one you want? Everything points to you not truly loving her, except for the fact that you are still with her. Why do you have to be married to her to be a friend and father to her children? If you truly loved her then why did you only ask her to marry you the day after she found out we slept together? Why not ask her before that, before you even met me? Why did you ask me out the first time we hung out? Why did you take it back when you found out she was pregnant? Why couldn't we have just dated anyways?
Why can't I let you go?

Loves,
(^I'm afraid that might be true^)
The One You Wanted/Can Have/Should Have And Deserve

PS(do you still want me?)

Letter To Self

Dear Me,

While you may not be 19 anymore, you are just a beautiful as ever. You have matured in to a beautiful woman! Who cares what you wear, or what things you have. All that matters is that you are healthy, and relatively young. Don't let anyone bring you down. You have so much to give to the world, so don't hold back thinking that you can't make a difference. You can and will make a difference just believe in yourself. Remember to be more patient with strangers because everyone you meet is going through some type of battle. Love yourself more, and it will reflect on to others. Most of all remember who you are and never loose that!

You will succeed!

Wii Thank You

Stranger,

I wish I knew your name. I just would like to thank you for helping me out on Black Friday. It really meant alot to me that you gave up the last Nintendo Wii. I'm sure karma will come back to you three fold. I couldn't afford the Wii without the discount, so thank you kind selfless stranger. I wish there was a way I could repay you.

Brooke
Janesville, Wisconson

Donor

Dear Sperm Donor,

FUCK YOU!!!! I'm gone! You are nothing but a piece of shit!

-Me

For The Boys

To My Incompetent Sister

I love you, but I love your children more. That is why I am getting a lawyer and going to get emergency custody of them. It is a damn shame that you are more worried about what your husband wants than what those boys need.

You and your husband are jobless, homeless, and burned all of your bridges. Don't forget that the hotel you are staying in right now is paid for by our father.

I talked to Dad and we are going to make sure those boys are taken care of. If you hate me forever; so be it. The most important thing right now is not what you want or think. Your boys are craving love, affection, and a stable place.

If you continue on the road you are on now, both of your boys will end up worse than your husband. Those children deserve better than the hand you have dealt them. Don't say that this is the hand God dealt you... he gave you free will, and you chose to use it poorly.

It brings me no great pleasure to do this, but it has to be done! I hope that someday you can understand that my love for those boys is what drives my decisions in this matter.

We offered to take the boys until the end of the school year, and let you figure out your life; I wish you would have let us take that route. Now we have to remove them forcefully, and that pains me.

We will give them back once you have a stable job and a stable home for them. We are not trying to take your boys forever. We are just trying to provide a good stable home for them .

Get your shit straight and you can have your boys back.

-Your Little Sister

P.S. I do love you

A Bullet For My Valentine

My Not-Boyfriend Boyfriend,

You're driving me insane. I don't know why I'm doing this. You're not my boyfriend, and you never will be. I know it. In my heart, I know it. But I can't let you go, because you make me so happy---you make me feel so beautiful. And you know me better than anyone. You're my best friend, truly. Dad says that just because you don't show me how you feel the way I show how I feel, doesn't mean you feel less for me than I do for you. That I should be accepting of your own way of showing affection. And to a degree, I am. But sometimes, it feels like you really only care about me because I care about you. And that, lovely, is not acceptable. I know that. In my heart, I know that. But I still can't let you go. And that drives me almost as crazy as you do.

I love you so much, and I feel like you're using me just to feel loved. You wanted me to show you my body, and I did. Without regret, I did. And you wanted me to show you my heart, and I did. Without regret, I did. And you wanted me to show you my soul, and I did. Without regret, I did. But now you're asking to keep all those things while you give nothing in return---except an occasional phone call. Except for an occasional (more often lately) "I love you." Except for the little ways you do show me you care.

When you told me I was beautiful, you spoke with a tone of honesty in your voice, an honesty I could see in your gorgeous eyes, but I couldn't believe you. I couldn't. Because what if you leave? No. Not if. When. What about when you leave? You're going to go, and you won't have said much---you'll have made no promises, just as you wanted---but I won't remember that until long after in my struggle to get over you. Every day, I will remember the little things you did, and said. And they will torture me. And I will wonder how you could say all those things, and mean them, and not mean them enough to stay.

I know that, because they are what keep me here. Those little comments you make. Those little random ways you surprise me by showing me you care. And I know you care---I know you do. It's not that you don't care. It's not even that you don't care enough. It's that you don't show me enough.

And yet, if you did, I would run shaking scared. So, I guess what I'm asking for is not for you to show me more. It's for you to keep showing me.

I'm asking you not to give up on me---not to give up on us. We could beautiful together. We are beautiful together. Please don't give that up...no one will ever love you like I do. I promise.
I'd sacrifice this world to hold you.

- your not-girlfriend girlfriend

p.s. It would help a lot if you didn't just compliment my looks when you want to mess around, or while we're messing around. It means a lot then, too---but it would mean more if it didn't feel like...mmm. It would help a lot.